1) Apply excessive amount of cologne and gobble a handful of tic-tacs.
2) Lock the doors.
3) Check your hair.
4) Show her your wallet.
5) Force her into a corner.
6) Get geopolitical. You know, Russian hands and Roman fingers. Amirite?
7) Show her your wallet again.
8) Check your hair.
9) Unlock the doors.
10) Make her leave.
11) Re-apply cologne.
12) Check your hair.
13) Deny everything.
14) Buy something nice for whatever number wife you're on.
15) Repeat as necessary.
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