What Fresh Hell Is This?

A sometime contributor to The Arizona Republic, Jon Gabriel, who publishes something called Ricochet, which from all appearances is just chock full of Conservative/Libertarian nonsense, recently wrote an opinion piece for the paper stating that he thinks Kamala Harris isn't cut out to be Vice President. With that sentiment in mind, perhaps we should recall some of her predecessors:

Richard Nixon was Eisenhower's veep. Enough said.

Spiro Agnew was Nixon's veep. And, quelle surprise, a convicted crook. Birds of a feather, I guess. 

 

Gerald Ford replaced Agnew and all he did was pardon Mr. I Am Not A Crook for his various crimes.

 

George H.W. Bush was neck deep in Iran-Contra while the Great Communicator and Mommy consulted their astrologist. 

 

Dan Quayle was out spelled by a child. 

 

Dick "The Dark Lord" Cheney gleefully led George "Simple W." Bush deeper into the Middle East abyss that we still haven't emerged from.

 

And Mike Pence was last seen cuddling up to the man whose followers desperately wanted to hang him not so long ago. Grovel much?

 

Quite a list, huh? All they have in common was their white maleness, their sterling Conservative Credentials, and that "R" beside their names. Coincidence? I don't think so.

Not cut out for? Don't make me laugh.

 

Thinning The Herd

For a group of people who don't believe in evolution, conservatives sure do love social Darwinism.

You start with the young. Weaken--or take away entirely--their public schools, hot lunch programs, Head Start, after school activities. Close as many public facilities as possible. Make getting gunned down at school a distinct possibility. Living with that constant fear in the pit of their stomachs will get them ready for adulthood. If they survive to adulthood. Remember to repeatedly tell them that nonsense about pulling themselves up by their bootstraps!

Then there's the sick. Take away as much health care as you can. Make it impossible for people with pre-existing conditions to get insurance. Let the drug companies charge whatever they want. Encourage people to go broke from paying hospital bills. Hey, it's their choice: that expensive, necessary surgery or food and housing. And you have to make choices in this life!

Finally, the old. Gut their pensions. Starve Social Security. Plenty of greeter jobs at WalMart, you lazy old fucks!

If you're a heartless Republican (or Libertarian) prick, dreaming sweet wet dreams of Ayn Rand's river of bullshit and the glories of the Free Market, it's really not that hard to do these things.

Poor people are such a drag. They had every opportunity in this greatest nation on the face of the earth to make enough money to pay for private schools, gold plated healthcare, and a happy and long retirement. And they just didn't do it.

Better off dead, you know?

Some Thoughts On The Death Of Antonin Scalia

Whoopee! Good! About time!

What's that? Oh, don't speak ill of the dead, is it?

That's not really a rule, though.

It's more like a guideline. And besides, it's not in the Constitution, and we all know what a strict original intent guy Nino was...so...

Besides, when a true rat bastard prick passes, all the rules and guidelines go out the window.

Don't worry. There will be rivers of tear filled epitaphs from the usual conservative suspects.

About how wise he was, and what a defender of the "true meaning" of the Constitution.

Somehow, in all his "wisdom", he almost always managed to rule for the powerful against the weak.

Gosh, what are the odds of that happening?

The man was a bigoted SOB, but at least he knew which side his bread was buttered on.

Whatever brilliance he may have possessed, and that's open to debate, was seldom used for the good
of the majority.

He and his like minded brethren on the Supreme Court have done more to harm this country than any other justices in our history.

So, fuck Antonin Scalia.

Gee, that seems a little harsh, so for the sensitive religious types among you, how about burn in Hell, Nino...

For eternity...

We Regulate Businesses Because Some Businessmen Are Crooked As A Dog's Hind Leg

I love it when the bought and paid for conservative politicians (of both parties) start whining about "onerous government regulations" stifling business.

If only we could unleash the might of the free market and pure capitalism, everything would be perfect!

The primary reason we have these regulations is because at some point, some upstanding business man, usually a pillar of the community, and quite probably a life long Republican, decided to see how much he could fuck over the populace.

Whether by poisoning the air, water, or food supply, or screwing over his workers, or cutting corners on safety, or any one of a seemingly endless number of shortcuts to save himself a buck, all while potentially harming the rest of us.

Now, the conservative/libertarian argument against regulation is that, if you hurt and/or kill enough people, eventually you'll be forced out of business by the "self-correcting" marketplace..............

Eventually.

That is just about the stupidest argument I can think of. A clever child wouldn't make that argument.

And yet we have allegedly "serious" politicians who do just that.

Madness, I tells ya. Shear madness.

Just Another Freak Show

The Duggar family, the reality TV clan famous for rabbit like fecundity if nothing else, have become right wing darlings. 

They preach abstinence before marriage and the usual collection of right wing crap. Anti-gay, anti-abortion, etc. They are courted by conservative politicians hoping to tap into that wide, rich, vein of unnatural stupidity that runs through the heartland of this great country of ours.

One of their sons, Josh Duggar, likes to molest little girls. In a pinch, his own sisters.

Oops.

Well, why waste the gas and travel time?

Besides, family values. Am I right?!

This is really not too surprising. You deny natural urges and all sorts of weird stuff bubbles up.

Take the Catholic Church, for instance.

Or the Christian televangelists who rant and rave, spit flying everywhere, all the way to the bank.

I suppose the question we should be asking ourselves is "how many perverts can you cram into one religion?"

I don't need a hard number, just ballpark it for me, would ya?

Not to worry, little Duggar.

Your God will forgive you... because apparently your God is as big a creep as you are.

Amen.

The Modern American Conservative: An Overview

Ignorant.
Bigoted.
Angry.
Armed.

What could possibly go wrong?

2014 CPAC Roundup

Uh, let's see...

It was just a bunch of delusional, bigoted, reactionary, halfwit assholes vying with each other to see who could be the most delusional, bigoted, reactionary, halfwit asshole.

All for the entertainment of an audience of delusional, bigoted, reactionary, halfwit assholes.

That's about it. Oh, and God Bless America!