Weather Report

Is it wrong for me to hope that Hurricane Dorian changes course once again and wipes Mar-a-Lago off the face of the earth?

No. It is not.

I am, as all good Americans are, only thinking of our Dear Leader's best interests.

Traitor Don's Florida show place is full of what every good Republican calls "illegal aliens", working their hardest, and no doubt underpaid, for the Orange Pustule's benefit.

Traitor Don's constituents, the world famous MAGAts, hate "illegal aliens". I wouldn't want TD to find himself in an ethical conundrum. Dorian can solve that problem for him.

Also, this would be a perfect time for some good old insurance fraud. Traitor Don, always short on cash and with way too much media attention focused on Deutsche Bank, his preferred laundered Russian money source--oops, I meant preferred lender--could make a killing by doing what he does best: LYING.

And finally, scraping the ruins of Mar-a-Lago away would leave a nice piece of land for Traitor Don and his vile son-in-law, little Jared Kushner, to build some slums. Which is something that Jared has experience doing.

It's a win win.

Q & A With The President Elect

What are you going to do about immigration?

Build a wall.

How are you going to pay for it?

Make Mexico.

How?

Make America Great Again.

What about all the undocumented workers?

Round 'em up and ship 'em back.

How?

Make America Great Again.

What about taxes?

Cut them.

How does that lower the deficit?

Make America Great Again.

What about wage stagnation and income inequality?

Make America Great Again.

What about the Middle East?

Destroy ISIS.

How?

Secret plan.

Oh?

Make America Great Again.

What about the infrastructure?

Rebuild it. We're a third world country now. Sad.

How are you going to pay for it?

Make America Great Again.

What about China?

Get tough with them.

How?

Make America Great Again.

What about Russia?

Putin is my kind of guy. Strong. Not weak. Strong.

What if he invades the Ukraine and the Baltic countries?

Make America Great Again.

The Jobs President

Let's say Der Trump makes good on his campaign promise to deport millions of "illegal aliens" immediately.

Who is going to do all the things they do for us?

Those angry Rust Belt folks?

Uh huh. Sure they are. For minimum wage--or less?

Pick fruit and vegetables and clean house and bus tables and do all sorts of hard manual labor?

I'd like to see a bunch of paunchy, pasty, Midwesterners picking lettuce, or digging ditches, or pruning trees, or...

In fact, it would make a great reality TV show.

No benefits. No healthcare. No leverage through a union.

Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch.

Just doing their part to Make America Great Again!

Oh, and by the way, that Carrier deal that Der Trump is so proud of is essentially a bribe with tax payer money. Gee, what a great negotiator he is!