Old Rap Brown was right about that, at least...
Violence is as American as cherry pie.
So, it's only natural that we loves us our guns.
Don't you be touchin' our guns!
Maybe it's just that human beings have a strong blood lust.
Not all, of course.
But enough.
And it seems like many have landed here, in the land o' the free...
We Yankee Doodle Dandies have a lot of blood on our hands: Native American, African, Mexican, Phillipine. Each others.
To be fair, it takes a certain amount of violence to build an Empire.
And that kind of behavior gets ingrained in a culture. It also attracts a certain kind of people. Just ask Wayne "A Gun Is A Tool, And So Am I" LaPierre.
So, of course the older brother shoots the younger sister. And the teenager shoots his best friend. And, my personal favorite, the 4 year old shoots his Dad.
Bang Bang--you're dead!
They're just kids after all. They don't understand the consequences of their actions. And they've grown up in a Shoot 'em up society.
Forget that "In God We Trust" nonsense. "I Didn't Know It Was Loaded" should be our national motto.
Anton Chekhov's famous maxim about writing is this: "If you say in the first chapter that there is a
rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely
must go off. If it's not going to be fired, it shouldn't be there."
We Americans, being uncomfortable with metaphors in general, and those coined by foreigners in particular, have taken Chekhov literally: If there's a gun on the table, someone is going to get shot. Accidentally, of course.
And also, of course, there's nothing we can do about it...
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
Monday, June 17, 2013
Trent Franks, Defender of the Unborn
Is anyone surprised that Trent Franks said something stupid again? Didn't think so.
Take a good close look at Franks, yet another of Arizona's illustrious Congressmen.
Would you say he's one or two chromosomes shy of completeness? Yep.
Franks keeps getting re-elected for one reason and one reason only: his district includes all of the dried up douche bags, male and female, in Sun City.
These are people who haven't been fertile since the Truman administration. Yet they get all worked up over "the rights of the unborn".
The operative theory goes something like this: Fetuses have rights, old people have rights, everybody else who isn't rich and white can suck it.
And Trent Franks, who isn't as dumb as he looks (it's close though), knows how to pander to their fears with the usual litany of right wing paranoia: immigration, the black man in "our" White House, etc.
Normally, these are the "get the government off our backs!" crowd. Why won't they just leave us alone!
Except when it comes to a woman's right to control her own reproductive system. Then the government should jump in with both jackbooted feet and punish the bitches!
These folks rely on government assistance of all kinds--but they hate the Federal government with a passion.
Oh, those meddlesome Feds, with their hot lunch programs, and Head Start, and public education, and welfare, and regulations, and taxes! Oh, don't get them started on taxes...
Get rid of all that stuff. It's socialism!
But keep your goddamn hands off our Social Security and our Medicare and our Medicaid!
It's cognitive dissonance like this that keeps the Trent Franks of the world in office.
Take a good close look at Franks, yet another of Arizona's illustrious Congressmen.
Would you say he's one or two chromosomes shy of completeness? Yep.
Franks keeps getting re-elected for one reason and one reason only: his district includes all of the dried up douche bags, male and female, in Sun City.
These are people who haven't been fertile since the Truman administration. Yet they get all worked up over "the rights of the unborn".
The operative theory goes something like this: Fetuses have rights, old people have rights, everybody else who isn't rich and white can suck it.
And Trent Franks, who isn't as dumb as he looks (it's close though), knows how to pander to their fears with the usual litany of right wing paranoia: immigration, the black man in "our" White House, etc.
Normally, these are the "get the government off our backs!" crowd. Why won't they just leave us alone!
Except when it comes to a woman's right to control her own reproductive system. Then the government should jump in with both jackbooted feet and punish the bitches!
These folks rely on government assistance of all kinds--but they hate the Federal government with a passion.
Oh, those meddlesome Feds, with their hot lunch programs, and Head Start, and public education, and welfare, and regulations, and taxes! Oh, don't get them started on taxes...
Get rid of all that stuff. It's socialism!
But keep your goddamn hands off our Social Security and our Medicare and our Medicaid!
It's cognitive dissonance like this that keeps the Trent Franks of the world in office.
Wednesday, June 12, 2013
LAW AND ORDER: SPECIAL ARIZONA UNIT
Rick Renzi, former US Congressman from Arizona's "whatever" district, (my benighted home state has been gerrymandered almost beyond recognition and certainly well beyond any form of common sense, so it's really hard to keep track of which district is which. For instance, Renzi's district included parts of northern Arizona and stretched down to the Straits of Magellan as well), has been found guilty by a federal jury on 17 out of 32 counts, including racketeering, conspiracy and extortion. The Triple Crown of political corruption, as it were.
Seems like he used his elected position to force certain land swaps that generated money so that one of the participants could pay back Renzi a very large sum. Which is, after all, why we have a Congress in the first place.
Naturally Renzi, who is apparently one of those "law and order" Republicans who don't believe that the "law" part of that formulation should apply to them personally, will appeal. To quote one of his defense team, "We are pleased that the jury acquitted Mr. Renzi on 15 counts. We are disappointed by every guilty verdict. We will continue to fight these charges..."
Well, at least as long as the money holds out...
Renzi's new defense should include the time tested "what's the use of having a place at the table if you can't enjoy the buffet?"
He might also want to simply throw himself on the mercy of the court. See, Renzi has 12 children.
That's right, 12. As in a dozen.
So the brother needs every single buck he can get his hands on. Legally or illegally.
Based on the number of little Renzi's running around, his team might also want to explore an insanity defense.
Seems like he used his elected position to force certain land swaps that generated money so that one of the participants could pay back Renzi a very large sum. Which is, after all, why we have a Congress in the first place.
Naturally Renzi, who is apparently one of those "law and order" Republicans who don't believe that the "law" part of that formulation should apply to them personally, will appeal. To quote one of his defense team, "We are pleased that the jury acquitted Mr. Renzi on 15 counts. We are disappointed by every guilty verdict. We will continue to fight these charges..."
Well, at least as long as the money holds out...
Renzi's new defense should include the time tested "what's the use of having a place at the table if you can't enjoy the buffet?"
He might also want to simply throw himself on the mercy of the court. See, Renzi has 12 children.
That's right, 12. As in a dozen.
So the brother needs every single buck he can get his hands on. Legally or illegally.
Based on the number of little Renzi's running around, his team might also want to explore an insanity defense.
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Happy Birthday Son
My son turns 18 today.
But that can't be possible. He was just born a couple of weeks ago.
He just took his first step, he just discovered cake and ice cream, he just started pre-school.
He just sang along to the Winnie the Pooh song.
He just saw his first movie.
He just learned to swim.
He just learned to throw a ball and ride a bike.
He just learned to read and quickly found out how wide and wonderful and magical the world can be.
He was just afraid of something in his room at night.
He just said "not all jokes are funny, Daddy."
He just made a few friends.
He just learned that not everyone is nice, but you should try to be nice to everyone.
He just won an Ultimate Frisbee state championship. He just won another.
He just fell in love for the first time. He just had his heart broken for the first time.
Next week he will graduate from high school, with honors.
Then I suppose it's off to college and out into the world.
And Mrs. Franklin and I sit and wonder at just how fast time can fly...
But that can't be possible. He was just born a couple of weeks ago.
He just took his first step, he just discovered cake and ice cream, he just started pre-school.
He just sang along to the Winnie the Pooh song.
He just saw his first movie.
He just learned to swim.
He just learned to throw a ball and ride a bike.
He just learned to read and quickly found out how wide and wonderful and magical the world can be.
He was just afraid of something in his room at night.
He just said "not all jokes are funny, Daddy."
He just made a few friends.
He just learned that not everyone is nice, but you should try to be nice to everyone.
He just won an Ultimate Frisbee state championship. He just won another.
He just fell in love for the first time. He just had his heart broken for the first time.
Next week he will graduate from high school, with honors.
Then I suppose it's off to college and out into the world.
And Mrs. Franklin and I sit and wonder at just how fast time can fly...
Friday, May 24, 2013
Democracy In The 21st Century
We've got a lot of nerve, trying to export "democracy" abroad when we no longer practice it at home.
"Chutzpah", I think our Jewish friends would call it.
For instance, in the US Senate, a simple majority is no longer considered a majority. No, now you need a "super" majority. Why? Just because the Republicans want it that way...or else they'll filibuster everything. Why? Because they still can. (We can thank, dear, trusting, simple minded Harry Reid for that one.)
OK, what about gun control? Having approximately 90% of the populace supporting some kind of new regulations should be enough, right? Au contraire, mon frere! The NRA doesn't want any changes and what the NRA wants the NRA gets. Wayne "A Gun Is A Tool And So Am I" LaPierre and his bags full of cash make sure of that.
Depending on how the questions are phrased, the majority of the American people also support abortion rights, gay marriage, green energy, sensible immigration reform, high speed rail, rebuilding the infrastructure, higher taxes for the rich, closing corporate tax loopholes, health care reform, cutting the defense budget, and a long list of other "progressive" actions.
So what's the problem? Guess.
That we are still arguing, and, as a result, stalemated over these issues is indicative of one thing:
Money trumps democracy almost every time. And the Supreme Court's decision in the Citizens United case has only made the situation exponentially worse.
Forget all that one man one vote, land of the free, "We the People" nonsense.
Money trumps democracy almost every time.
That is the one thing we really should teach the kids in school. That and Mandarin.
"Chutzpah", I think our Jewish friends would call it.
For instance, in the US Senate, a simple majority is no longer considered a majority. No, now you need a "super" majority. Why? Just because the Republicans want it that way...or else they'll filibuster everything. Why? Because they still can. (We can thank, dear, trusting, simple minded Harry Reid for that one.)
OK, what about gun control? Having approximately 90% of the populace supporting some kind of new regulations should be enough, right? Au contraire, mon frere! The NRA doesn't want any changes and what the NRA wants the NRA gets. Wayne "A Gun Is A Tool And So Am I" LaPierre and his bags full of cash make sure of that.
Depending on how the questions are phrased, the majority of the American people also support abortion rights, gay marriage, green energy, sensible immigration reform, high speed rail, rebuilding the infrastructure, higher taxes for the rich, closing corporate tax loopholes, health care reform, cutting the defense budget, and a long list of other "progressive" actions.
So what's the problem? Guess.
That we are still arguing, and, as a result, stalemated over these issues is indicative of one thing:
Money trumps democracy almost every time. And the Supreme Court's decision in the Citizens United case has only made the situation exponentially worse.
Forget all that one man one vote, land of the free, "We the People" nonsense.
Money trumps democracy almost every time.
That is the one thing we really should teach the kids in school. That and Mandarin.
Monday, May 13, 2013
Chinese Lightbulbs
Everything falls apart, eventually.
That is a given.
For proof look no further than your bathroom mirror. What stares back at you now as compared to what stared back at you last week, or last year, or 10 years ago?
With time, and the proper medication, we can expect and accept that sort of decay....
However, when things fall apart long before they should, long before they once did, well, that's a horse of a different color.
As a society, we seem to be on an endless quest to find cheaper ways to do things.
Cheaper is not always better, the Wal Mart family's fortune to the contrary.
Cheaper usually involves lower wages, lax safety and environmental standards, poorer quality, compromises all along the line.
It is cheaper to pollute. It is cheaper to let infrastructure decay. It is cheaper to incarcerate.
In the short run.
It is always cheaper and easier to do nothing.
One thing we can be sure of: somewhere, someone is making a killing off of cheaper.
And that profit is used to buy a Congress full of short-sighted grifters, libertarian nihilists, religious hypocrites, corporate toadies, and just plain, run of the mill imbeciles.
And once that bought and paid for Congress convinces us that we as a nation can't afford to do the things that once made us great, well, heaven help us all.
If they are allowed to, it only takes a handful of very rich folks to impoverish a multitude of regular folks.
Everything falls apart.
That is a given.
For proof look no further than your bathroom mirror. What stares back at you now as compared to what stared back at you last week, or last year, or 10 years ago?
With time, and the proper medication, we can expect and accept that sort of decay....
However, when things fall apart long before they should, long before they once did, well, that's a horse of a different color.
As a society, we seem to be on an endless quest to find cheaper ways to do things.
Cheaper is not always better, the Wal Mart family's fortune to the contrary.
Cheaper usually involves lower wages, lax safety and environmental standards, poorer quality, compromises all along the line.
It is cheaper to pollute. It is cheaper to let infrastructure decay. It is cheaper to incarcerate.
In the short run.
It is always cheaper and easier to do nothing.
One thing we can be sure of: somewhere, someone is making a killing off of cheaper.
And that profit is used to buy a Congress full of short-sighted grifters, libertarian nihilists, religious hypocrites, corporate toadies, and just plain, run of the mill imbeciles.
And once that bought and paid for Congress convinces us that we as a nation can't afford to do the things that once made us great, well, heaven help us all.
If they are allowed to, it only takes a handful of very rich folks to impoverish a multitude of regular folks.
Everything falls apart.
Saturday, April 27, 2013
Welcome To The George W. Bush Presidential Library; Please Switch Off Your Brains
They opened up the George W. Bush Presidential Library the other day.
Is this a great country, or what?
Here's a guy who was without question a total disaster as President. And believe me, having lived through Nixon, Reagan, and Bush the Elder, I have a fairly high threshold for disasters.
But Simple W. set the bar at a level that one hopes will never be approached again. Let us count the ways:
Asleep at the switch for 9-11 whilst cuddling up with his Saudi soul mates; dropped the ball on Bin Laden's pursuit at Tora Bora at the same time his administration was legitimizing torture; bait and switch war in Iraq that cost us more than a trillion dollars, not to mention all the death, dismemberment, and PTSD; turned a budget surplus into a huge deficit with his tax cuts; watched Wall Street run wild because he believed in the beauty of the unregulated "free market"; half-assed response to Katrina; wanted to privatize Social Security; shit all over the Constitution every chance he got..Jesus, the list goes on and on, but I'm starting to have flashbacks...
So anyway, because it's de rigueur for former Presidents, Incurious George gets himself a library. Keep in mind, this is a fella who probably hasn't read anything since My Pet Goat and very little before.
Now, there's a very good reason for this: Books are sometimes filled with facts, and facts can get messy. And since Bush's administration decided early on that they would create their own reality, it is only natural that the George W. Bush Presidential Library would be dedicated to the completely counter factual narrative that Bush was a great leader, a great President, and a great American.
Shortly after Obama was elected the first time, a billboard appeared by the highway in the desert near Yuma, Arizona. It featured the beaming face of George W. Bush and the words "Do You Miss Me Yet?"
Of course the only sane answer to that would be "No, no we don't. Not now, not ever."
Fortunately for W. (and the Bush family in general), the American people have a tremendous capacity to forgive, but an even greater capacity to forget.
Is this a great country, or what?
Here's a guy who was without question a total disaster as President. And believe me, having lived through Nixon, Reagan, and Bush the Elder, I have a fairly high threshold for disasters.
But Simple W. set the bar at a level that one hopes will never be approached again. Let us count the ways:
Asleep at the switch for 9-11 whilst cuddling up with his Saudi soul mates; dropped the ball on Bin Laden's pursuit at Tora Bora at the same time his administration was legitimizing torture; bait and switch war in Iraq that cost us more than a trillion dollars, not to mention all the death, dismemberment, and PTSD; turned a budget surplus into a huge deficit with his tax cuts; watched Wall Street run wild because he believed in the beauty of the unregulated "free market"; half-assed response to Katrina; wanted to privatize Social Security; shit all over the Constitution every chance he got..Jesus, the list goes on and on, but I'm starting to have flashbacks...
So anyway, because it's de rigueur for former Presidents, Incurious George gets himself a library. Keep in mind, this is a fella who probably hasn't read anything since My Pet Goat and very little before.
Now, there's a very good reason for this: Books are sometimes filled with facts, and facts can get messy. And since Bush's administration decided early on that they would create their own reality, it is only natural that the George W. Bush Presidential Library would be dedicated to the completely counter factual narrative that Bush was a great leader, a great President, and a great American.
Shortly after Obama was elected the first time, a billboard appeared by the highway in the desert near Yuma, Arizona. It featured the beaming face of George W. Bush and the words "Do You Miss Me Yet?"
Of course the only sane answer to that would be "No, no we don't. Not now, not ever."
Fortunately for W. (and the Bush family in general), the American people have a tremendous capacity to forgive, but an even greater capacity to forget.
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