Everything He Says Is A Lie`

In poker, a game at which the Mission Man is much more accomplished than I will ever be, there's a thing called a "tell".

A usually subtle "give away" that a player may not even be aware that they're doing. A frown, a twitch, a blink, a pursing of the lips....

But a skilled player can take that seemingly insignificant "tell" and figure out how strong the hand you have is.

Donald J. Trump has a "tell".

And it isn't particularly subtle.

In fact, it's really simple. No need for deep analysis.

When he opens his mouth, everything he says is a lie. 

Doesn't matter what the subject is. Could be anything: immigration, foreign policy, the economy, race relations, his big bad Wall, China, North Korea, the European alliance, Russia--especially Russia.

I suppose he can't help himself. He's gotten away with it all of his adult life. Why stop now? Or perhaps he really believes all the bullshit he spews constantly. The end result is the same.

This is the consequence of a life without consequences.

Are All Republicans Traitors?

Or just most?

Are they all racists?

Or just most?

Here's the deal, and it's not that complicated: If you support a racist--You are a racist. And there is really no need to argue about it.

Oh, you can pretend that you aren't. Maybe even convince yourself and your like minded friends.

Doesn't change what you are.

If you support a traitor--You are a traitor, too.

So, forget all of that blah blah blah nonsense about "populism" and "white working class angst" and Making America Great Again.

Pure camouflage. Pure horse shit.

People that still support Donald J. Trump are racist traitors.

Now, maybe not all Republicans are racist traitors.

But the ones who aren't better find a spine and a little bit of moral courage and start speaking the fuck up.

Or they might as well be.

The Great Negotiator

The Great Negotiator will know, within a few seconds, a minute tops, how this is going to go.

He will look into the soul of his opposite, and instantly determine the outcome.

It is this seeming sixth sense that has guided him through all those bankruptcies.

Foresight, I think they call it.

You cannot be a successful grifter without foresight, after all.

And through all the years, the Great Negotiator has been a very successful grifter. Conned a bunch of suckers. Millions at last count.

So what's one more? And an Asian at that! Should be simple.

Piece of cake, in fact. The world's best chocolate cake, if you're wondering. Cake that someone like you has never seen the likes of. It worked before. It will work again!

It helps that the Great Negotiator's best friend, indeed his bromance buddy, Vlad, can put his hand on the scales at any moment, and make the Asian bend to his wishes.

What are friends for?

Gee, I Hate To Be Crude, But...

Ivanka Trump really is a feckless cunt.

Now, before anyone gets their right wing, "real" American, snowflake panties all in a bunch, I don't mean that in a sexual, or misogynistic, way. I use that word in its English context. Not American. English.

In the way that Mick Jagger meant, back in the '60's, when a stuffy old man who, no doubt appalled by Mick's long hair and Carnaby street kit, asked him "what he thought he looked like" causing Jagger to reply "don't know. So long as I don't look a cunt like you."

See? It means something different.

An idiot. A fool. A poseur.

And therefore perfectly fitting for Ivanka Trump.

Or her brothers, for that matter. Or her husband.

Or her father. Especially her father.

In fact, the Trump Administration is made up almost entirely of Feckless Cunts.

They should trademark the name, make a couple of dollars for Trump Inc.

Big Button Showdown Time?

Happily for satirists everywhere, it looks like our asshole in chief will meet with their asshole in chief.

At least for now...

Who knows what tomorrow might bring? Comedy, after all, lurks everywhere, and our Traitor in Chief is nothing if not irrationally mercurial. We are always one demented tweet away from everything falling apart.

All I can say is, if and when they do meet it will be like they're both looking in a mirror.

Shithead y shithead as our Spanish speaking friends might say.

Never forget one thing: North Korea is not, and has never been, an existential threat to the United States.

They are an annoyance.

Sure, they can be a loud annoyance. But only a two bit punk would get all upset about them. And only a two bit punk would be distracted by them.

Unfortunately, we have a two bit punk in the White House.

Real men don't get upset about little boys rattling their tiny sabers.

And if we had a real man in the White House this wouldn't be much of an issue.

Unfortunately, for the time being at least, we have Donald J. Trump--the exact opposite of a real man--in the White House.

Hopefully, the Master Negotiator won't sign over Hawaii to Kim Jong-un in exchange for some magic beans, and a McDonald's franchise in Pyongyang.