Hey, Let's Just Pretend None Of This Ever Happened

History is such a messy thing. I mean, gosh, you've got slavery and racism and religious wars, you've got genocide against native peoples, you've got Dark Ages, and Inquisitions, and all manner of barbarism. And let's not forget the constant ongoing thievery of the ruling classes.

No wonder our conservative Republican and Libertarian friends want to rewrite it, erasing all of the bad stuff from high school history curricula.

Children's heads should never be troubled by the truth. A questioning child is an unruly child, after all....

Thank God there are, all across this great land of ours, Republican controlled school boards and legislatures sworn to protect the little darlings!

Better to teach them happy fantasies and Bible stories about how well cared for and content the slaves were, how Reagan was a saint, FDR was the devil, how evil welfare is, how wonderful the free market system, how benevolent the job creators were and are. Evolution is the Devil's work, Darwin only wants to deceive you, Jesus rode a dinosaur, and the Founding Fathers were inspired by God Himself.

Don't worry, be happy! After all, ignorance is bliss, baby! Pure, unadulterated All-American bliss!

Say What?

As I was driving from Starbucks to Starbucks the other day, searching for even the vaguest hint of consistency in their products, I heard someone on the radio talking about a "Republican outreach to minority voters." I tell you, I almost crashed.

Let's see. First you consistently, from day one, demonize the first black president by calling him all sorts of names: Marxist, un-American, anti-colonial Kenyan, socialist, non-American, the anti-Christ, American hating Muslim, etc. Your spiritual leader, Rush "Pig Boy" Limbaugh even mocks the First Lady's figure. Stay classy, Pig Boy.

Your mouth piece, Fox "News", attacks a teenage gymnast, who just happens to be black, calling her "unpatriotic" because of her leotard (!) and criticizing her hair (!).

Then there's the organized attempt at rampant voter suppression, including the various forms of what can only be called "poll taxes" being instituted by Republican controlled state legislatures, which is the only way the Republicans have a chance at winning this election.

Add to this the constant dog whistle catch phrases that make up most Republican rhetoric these days.  You know, "welfare", "the food stamp President", "law and order" (the great Jimmy Breslin once wrote that "law and order" means only one thing to a certain kind of white voter: "Get the nigger!").

(I regret having to use that word, but that's what the man said, and he knows what he's talking about.)

Oh, and let's not forget George "Stand Your Ground" Zimmerman, poster boy for the Second Amendment.

And now you decide to reach out to African American voters? Amazing.

As for Latinos, the other important minority voting block, I have two words for our Republican friends: Joe Arpaio.

And how about a couple of letters and a number: SB1070.

But good luck with your outreach!

Voter Fraud

It has become Republican gospel that we are suffering from rampant voter fraud.

According to the GOP this fraud is always perpetrated by Democrats.

They can produce no proof that this has happened. But by God they know in their hearts that it must be true. So as always, the facts be damned!

And the best way to stop this heinous assault on our cherished Republic is to disenfranchise anyone they can.

Old people, young people, minorities--you are all under suspicion. You cannot be trusted and the country would be better off if you weren't allowed to vote. So practically every Republican controlled legislature in the country has set about to ensure that you can't.

Funny, the only rampant "voter fraud" that I've ever seen has been Republicans getting elected by claiming to support working people, and then crawling cozily into the first corporate pocket they see.

Republicans "Support working people"? Now that's fraud.