The First American Freedom

Forget about religion, assembly, a free press, or bearing arms.

Ditto for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Take a good look around, and you'll see that the ur-American freedom is the freedom to be a complete, fucking, idiot.

That is the only possible explanation for Trump and his MAGAt followers.

And their little "protests".

And their little guns.

And their refusal to wear masks or social distance or believe in science in general.

It can all be traced back to their little, malfunctioning brains.

Zombies

Generally, I do not believe in crazy things like vampires, werewolves, the Laffer Curve--you know, sheer lunacy.

Of course, this list should include zombies.

I mean, what's crazier than zombies?

Recently, however, I've been forced to reevaluate my thoughts on the undead, rising from their graves to consume human flesh.

You see, I watched some footage of Trump rallies, and, well...

There can be no other rational explanation for the brain dead, foaming at the mouth crowd that our Traitor in Chief unfailingly attracts.

They are all zombies. Honestly, what else could they be?

You Might Be A Racist If...

You've ever started a sentence with, "I'm not a racist, but..."

You think that slavery wasn't that bad.

You're fond of telling other American citizens to "go back to where they came from."

You have a Confederate flag.

You're a Republican who remains silently complicit.

You support Donald J. Trump.

You are related to Donald J. Trump.

You are Donald J. Trump.

See, it's really not that hard to spot a racist. I don't know what the confusion is. Or the hesitation to call things what they truly are.

Because when someone shows you what they are, over and over again, only a fool wouldn't believe them.

Farmer Donald

Farmer Donald had some pigs, ee eye ee eye oh!

And wherever Farmer Donald went, his pigs were sure to follow.

They stand behind him, their fat, mostly white, vacant, porcine faces glowing with a heady combination of stupidity and hatred.

And everything that Farmer Donald said, his pigs were sure to chortle.

Whether it be racist (oink) or sexist (oink, oink) or just another one of Farmer Donald's seemingly endless supply of hate filled lies (oink, oink, oink), the pigs would wallow in the verbal garbage like, well, like pigs.

It makes one wonder, in the brief amount of time that a sane person can watch it without retching, is this a political rally or a 4 H Fair?

In hind sight, "Deplorables" is really way too kind.