metatag

Sunday, January 7, 2024

TOP SECRET: NSA Phone Intercept. 1.7.24 Moscow Station

(VP Kremlin direct line rings. Recording begins)

VP: Da?

DJT: Boss it's me.

VP: Who is "me"?

DJT: Donald

VP: (silence)

DJT: Your boy. Donald.

VP: I don't, uh, I don't recall any Donalds. You must have wrong number.

( call disconnects)

(VP Kremlin direct line rings)

VP: Hello?

DJT: Boss, we had a deal.

VP: Deal? 

DJT: Yes. Yes deal--

VP: What is this deal you say we had? 

DJT: You know, uh, our deal.

VP: No idea what you're talking about.

DJT: Boss, that's not funny.

VP: You know what's not funny? I will tell you. I put a lot of money into you and all your little friends over there. And what do I have to show for it? I will tell you. I have Ukrainian drones blowing up a lot of my stuff. I have sanctions freezing my money and my friends' money. I have NATO expanding while my armies are contracting, one corpse at a time. All in all I have royal pain in my ass.That's what I have to show for "our" deal.

DJT: But-

VP: I tell you, at this point all I can do for you is send some of my Mama's special tea. Old Russian recipe. Sip to your health.

DJT: But-

VP: Das vedanya.

DJT: (unintelligible)

VP: Bye bye.

(call ends)

(recording ends)

No comments: