Saturday, September 5, 2015

Other Donald Trump Pledges

By now you've probably heard that Donald J. Trump, alleged billionaire, multiple bankruptee, failed casino owner, angry white male, and still leading the Republican Presidential Nominee goat fuck, has pledged his fealty to whoever or whatever ultimately comes out ahead in the goat fucking.

Real team player, that Don.

But what you don't know about are some of the other pledges Trump has made:

Use only Mob approved concrete on his Keep The Mexicans Out Wall.

Get to the bottom of what the hell is going on with his "hair".

Create a low paying job for every non-union Polish temporary visa construction worker he can find.

Continue to spout ridiculous, inaccurate things about immigrants, minorities, women, President Obama, and random strangers--just because he can.

If elected, will restore America's pride and position in the world by showing all those other sad, little, unimportant countries that even with a rich, ego maniacal, blowhard, idiot in charge, we're still better than them.

Ditch wife number 3 if she starts to wrinkle or sag anywhere.

Be yooge, wonderful, super, and the best 24-7 365!

Deport his barber.

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