1. Too many MAGA flags.
2. Too many MAGAts on board.
3. AntiFa submarines.
4. Didn't understand how water works. Waves? Wakes? It's all so complicated!
5. Black Lives Matter sank it.
6. But her emails!
7. Obama's fault.
8. Sea Monsters! Ai-yee!
9. It's obviously a Deep State conspiracy.
10. Somali pirates.
11. God's Will.
12. I'm an idiot.
13. Karma (see number 12).
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