Monday, June 13, 2016

Foreigners' Travel Advisory

So, you're thinking of traveling to the United States!

We welcome you with open arms!

This is the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave!

Enjoy our purple mountains majesty. Enjoy our fruited plains.

Enjoy our triple cheeseburgers. Enjoy our Kardashians.

But please respect our culture.

And always remember, our right to indiscriminate slaughter is one of our most sacred rights.

Make that our most right.

Guns everywhere and guns for everyone!

So, wherever you go in our exceptional land, whether school, mall, nightclub, or even house of worship, there's a good possibility that some moody loner-religious nut-psycho-aggrieved patriot may shoot you.

And there's nothing we care to do about it. So don't even ask.

It's just the way we are...

Welcome to the USA! Enjoy your stay!

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