Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Pick A Card, Any Card

So the good GOPers of Florida think Rick "My State Is On Fire And It's Obama's Fault" Perry is too crazy? And Willard Mitt "When I Say Don't Tax Rich People What I Mean Is Don't Tax Me" Romney is not crazy enough?

The 3 card monte game that is the Republican presidential primary system continues...

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you this week's Tea Party chosen son, Herman "9-9-9 Shall Be The Number Of The Beast" Cain!!! Who favors a 9% flat tax, 'cause rich folks love flat taxes. 'Cause they don't pay as much under a flat tax. And that means they have more money to create jobs! Ha Ha Ha.

(The most famous promoter of the flat tax idea is that flatulent load Steve Forbes, who in my humble opinion would look good roasting on a spit with an apple in his mouth. But I digress...)

And because flat taxes never raise as much money as that socialist scourge of free market capitalists everywhere, the progressive income tax, it also means that there are even less services for the people who aren't rich. Less money for libraries and schools and mass transit. Because those are things that rich people don't need. So away with them!! Less money for roads and bridges. And cops and firemen. Away with them, I say!!

Hermie Cain, pizza mogul, would also like to privatize Social Security, following in his words, "the Chilean model." Because when you think of progressive economic and social policy, Pinochet era Chile is the first place that comes to mind. Right?

Sadly for all concerned, the ugly truth is that after being in effect for more than 30 years, the "Chilean model" has been found somewhat wanting.

Oh, the fees charged to invest the people's money have made the Chilean bankers very rich indeed. (Which I'm guessing was the idea all along.) However, an estimated 50% of Chileans will still need some form of government assistance to avoid living their golden years in abject poverty. Or maybe they can just work as Wal Mart greeters until they drop?

Nice try Herm. Thanks but no thanks. Enjoy your week or two as Republican Tea Party frontrunner, bask in the simpering adoration of the Fox Talking Heads, and then it's off to the ash bin of history for you. Say hello to Augusto Pinochet for me, OK?


No comments: